See if you can read this synopsis of “I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry” without gagging:
Chuck Levine and Larry Valentine are the pride of their fire station: two guy’s guys always side-by-side and willing to do anything for each other. Grateful Chuck owes Larry for saving his life in a fire, and Larry calls in that favor big time when civic red tape prevents him from naming his own two kids as his life insurance beneficiaries. But when an overzealous, spot-checking bureaucrat becomes suspicious, the new couple’s arrangement becomes a citywide issue and goes from confidential to front-page news. Forced to improvise as love-struck newlyweds, Chuck and Larry must now fumble through a hilarious charade of domestic bliss under one roof. After surviving their mandatory honeymoon and dodging the threat of exposure, the well-intentioned con men discover that sticking together in your time of need is what truly makes a family.
Oh how visible the thought process of the writers (it took three!) who formulated this two-hour lighthearted fagfest is. Take two extremely masculine men (firefighters of course) who probably drink beer for breakfast and then force them into playing homosexuals in a series of endless gags where they must pretend to be grossed out by the sight of “icky” breasts because, of course, they’re gay. All because there is no way to name your kids next of kin other than entering into a domestic partnership.
Uh oh, is that Kevin James as Larry trying to buy tampons because, he’s gay? Comedy gold!
No points for guessing that the “lawyer” played by Jessica Biel who by chance has just broken up with her boyfriend and has no qualms with stripping in front of her clients (I guess it’s ok when it’s a gay client) will learn the “truth” about Chuck and Larry’s pseudo gayness and hook up with Sandler’s character, Chuck, in the end after he learns the true meaning of being a homo.
It’s a Happy Madison production, so of course Rob Schneider found work this year. From the previews I learned that he plays (I believe) an Asian wedding coordinator who presides over Chuck and Larry’s Jewish wedding. Can gays get married in a Jewish ceremony? I don’t know, and I wouldn’t rely on this film for accurate information on Judaism, gays, or Jewish guys pretending to be gay.
There will nevertheless be a positive pro-gay message somewhere at the end of the film, so Hollywood can say it respects homosexuality while at the same time profiting and making fun of it for two hours.